No one is born holding all the wisdom or knowledge, but we can learn and understand, any great truths from books, blogs or advice from sage teachers. Teachers need to guide students and parents when they are operating on emotion and not acting in the best interest of students growth. Parents need to guide teachers when they have views or ideas that will grow a child's passion, curiosity, creativity and an intrinsic love of learning.
12 GOLDEN RULES:
1. Believe your child will achieve! Do not underestimate your children – they can understand and do far more than you can even imagine. If you make children believe they are inadequate in words or through actions, this will affect their development and self-worth. Achievement and wisdom are developed through daily practice, passion, curiosity, and yes this must include failures.
Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us. Wilma Rudolph2. Take the high road! Don’t use threats – children love a challenge and love to learn but once threatened they might go on with the task to escape the punishment but the fire of creativity and the spark of curiosity may be extinguished.
He who threatens us will find us deaf to his threats. We are willing to listen only to rational arguments. Menachem Begin3. Build on Dreams and Curiosity! Do not bribe your children – if you are trying to get them to learn for money or rewards, for example, they will fail to understand the purpose or importance of learning, all they will get from this is the importance of money and getting rewards. Your child will endlessly ask what do they get for learning or completing a task, the intrinsic desire to learn will be stunted.
Though the bribe be small, yet the fault is great. Edward Coke4. Noticing virtuous and honorable moments, not manufacturing them. Do not make a small child promise to do something – a small child will readily make promises when asked, but small children can’t remember or keep promises so don’t force them to lie and then punish them because they have disappointed you.
It makes my heart sick when I remember all the good words and the broken promises. Chief Joseph5. Failure is the greatest teacher. Don't keep your children on a short leash – to grow up normally children need some space, some freedom and trust. Keeping children from experiencing real trust and all the responsibility that goes with it, we end up micromanage children's lives and create children that are incapable of dealing with failure.
You cannot hope to build a better world without improving the individuals. To that end, each of us must work for his own improvement and, at the same time, share a general responsibility for all humanity, our particular duty being to aid those to whom we think we can be most useful. Marie Curie6. Speak the plain truth. Do not use big words, over-explain, or expound on many points when you are giving feedback to a young child – keep your ideas simple and concrete/concise so they can understand everything you have to share. Explain possible wise choices.
When we make progress and get better at something, it is inherently motivating. In order for people to make progress, they have to get feedback and information on how they're doing. Dan Pink7. Free-will and discipline are tempered with challenges. Do not expect obedience and responsibility all the time– a child has to be taught to think for themselves and deal with the consequences, they need to learn when to follow orders, question, and even when to disobey.
In this life, we have to make many choices. Some are very important choices. Some are not. Many of our choices are between good and evil. The choices we make, however, determine to a large extent our happiness or our unhappiness, because we have to live with the consequences of our choices. James E. Faust8. Curiosity and passion outlast trivial treasures. Do not indulge children – indulging and rewarding children in not caring for them, making your children happy with rewards is making them incapable! Success gained through great effort and toil is the greatest reward.
9. Be virtuous and honorable in all actions. Do not compromise when it comes to the rules especially the Golden Rule– for rules to become educative, formative, and intrinsic all aspects of the Golden Rule must be respected. A game is never fun or fair with no rules! Your actions speak louder than your words.
10. The Golden Rule is King! Don’t impose arbitrary rules that don’t fit with the age of your students/children.
11. Fear and anger are poor motivators and create resentment. Do not try to inflict guilt or use guilt to motivate children – guilt is not an appropriate external motivator for children, especially if they are little.
12. Don’t give your students/children rules that you don’t take seriously or model – your students/children may try to please you and follow the rules, but they will see your hypocrisy and may not respect you or future rules.
All these “GOLDEN RULES” are addressed first to the parent. But they are to be referred to by teachers and educators as well. Along with the parents, they will settle upon an attitude and strategy for the education and growth of the child, so that they can give him all the things he needs to properly develop emotionally and physically.